It is important to remember that no matter what, people are individuals, and even though some cultural norms should be taken into consideration, we should drop our expectations of how we think the person “should” act, and look more at how they ARE acting.You may understand why you are initially attracted to someone from a different culture (the accent may be cute or romantic, it just may be something different from what you have ever experienced), but take a second to think about why the other person may be attracted to you.Many female expats in Japan agreed that it can be difficult to land a date with a Japanese man.Instead of asking a girl out for a cup of coffee and taking it from there, the man is culturally expected to very dramatically confess his deep feelings to the girl.Not all the women I have met have been attracted by the money, but it has certainly helped get their attention when they first learn that I have a car, own a large house, have a business and am a gringo.” One thing to be aware of, especially here in Latin America where I am living, is to not assume that a man making an advance on you is single. Of course it is never possible, nor correct, to say that this is the case with all Latin men, but I have personally known more than my fair share who see no problem with dating another woman, even when they are married with down the road. So let’s say you are at the point where you do want to go out on a date…how do you start, and what is okay to do on that date?They might not have told you, because depending on the guy, it just may not be a big deal to them, definitely not worth spending much time discussing! In some cultures, a woman would NEVER be so bold to ask a guy out, whereas in others it is perfectly acceptable.We may have notions in our head, whether we are consciously aware of them or not, that need to be dropped before dating someone from a different culture.Unfortunately, not all Italian boys will pick us up in a Ferrari to go wine tasting at their personal vineyard, followed by an incredible night of pleasure under the stars, ending with them, shirtless, bringing us a cappuccino in the morning. I was totally kidding about the husband and three kids, so feel free to contact me anytime!
Or they see you as their ticket to a passport or Visa, or at least a free ride in the meantime.Xander explains: “You go out to a pub with your friends, some of whom are girls, get too drunk one night (but not drunk) and end up sleeping with one of them. And since she’s already slept with you, you won’t be rejected – presumably.And it usually works out quite well since you were friends first.” Although India is westernizing in many ways, dating is not yet culturally accepted.I kept trying to tell my husband that I needed to go get romanced by a few select Argentine hotties in town for “research” on this topic, (hey, I’m a committed professional, what can I say? Intercultural dating is something that will probably come up eventually for single and social expats living abroad.Some expats choose to date the locals because they really do not connect with or mingle with the other expats.
Xander’s girlfriend, Miranda, provides eye-witness testimony to the accuracy of their account. They are convinced that if they were to directly ask a woman on a “date” that they will be turned down flat and laughed at publicly.